It's not good to sigh~ =)

Bismisllahirrahmanirrahim...

Haa, da dekat 2bln x update blog nih. I knew this cud happen from the very first moment I started blogging. kui3... reading and writing, a couple of things that I reaallyy dont like doing. *sigh*.... eh x boleh mngeluh laa... xbaekk... =P

Drafts remain drafts... unposted... thot to finish them, but cudnt really find the time. (yelaa tuu...). nak update plak time exam... hua3...

Rusna baru masuk bilik ni, pastu dia bgtau kak Aini (sr ktorg kat Hradec Kralove) dah di'diagnosed' dgn anak laki. heee....tahniah! wpun x rapat ngn kak Aini, tp rse excited jgk. The boy will be the first baby of Malaysian students in Czech Republic inysaAllah. =) moga2 kak Aini dan baby dirahmati Allah sentiasa... besar pahala kak Aini. hehe... srunuk2!
Boleh bayangkan semorg kat Czech mesti nak gi melawat baby tu nanti. Untung jadi baby sulung ni kan. pastu dapat banyak2 hadiah... pastu semorg nak dukung... pastu semorg knal nama dia. uih, jauh la plak berangan. hobi saya ialah berangan. =P

Byk benda nak tulis sbnrnye. tp rasa besalah kalo duk lama2 kat blog ni. (kui3...kalo facebook xpe la plak. aigoo syamira...)

nway, satu lagi shocking news to me. It happened a few days ago when suddenly my sister told me that my great-grandma collapsed! my aunt first suspected she had a brain stroke. but Alhamdulillah it was only hypoglycemia. =) syukur2... cudnt imagine if anything bad happened to her and I'm still here, in the middle of my exam term. I always thot that losing her will be like losing my own mother. memang rapat teramat dgn moyang time kecik2 dulu. I loved spending the weekends kat rumah Nek. And we would go to the kebun together2, with my late great-grandpa (may he rest in peace), minum air kelapa muda, panjat pokok, kutip buah, naik motor pusing kampung, bakar pacat dgn tembakau, if the pacat dared to come and suck my sweet blood...buat sudu drpd kulit kelapa utk makan isi die... too many things when I spent too much time with them.

Everytime I got scared of my mum, or went into fight with her (selalu gaduh ngn mak time kecik2..hehe), I would go and find Nek. I would tell my father to send me to her house, and pick me up when the weekend's over. Pernah jgk smpai penat mama suruh balik, xnak balik jgk. Mum told me that when I was little, about 1year old or so, she couldn't find a babysitter/nanny to watch over me, so she asked Nek to babysit me. =) I'm glad that she was the one who took care of me. She took care of my mother, and also me when we were little. Practically, in a way, she's our 'Mother'. (my grandparents left my mum to my great-grandparents after they divorced). So I think that's why, deep inside, I could feel this very strong bond connecting me and her. I'm not ready to lose her. Not yet.

Kalo tido rumah Nek, my breakfast would be the delicious nasi kerabu, and Nek would have her favourite nasi dagang, beli dekat kedai Sauli. and she would have a glass of nescafe with that, plus anlene (as the substitute for creamer) for the added value, to keep her strong during the day. Nek, please be strong. Wait for me, I'll be back. Just wait for me.

I love to 'sakat' her sebab Nek suka sangat melatah. She had this funny character that we always loved to make fun of, by me and my uncle. There were times when I secretly followed her to the kedai and sakat dia depan makcik jual nasik tu. It was fun doing it. I hope I will still have the chance to see her melatah.

I know that it might be impossible for me to take care of her like she did to me, but I hope, I really really hope, I still can spend some time with her, and sleep by her side, and hug her, kiss her grey-hair, and tell her I will be coming back.

I don't cry a lot. But having thoughts of her, could really shed my tears, and I won't be able to stop it until a while.





This time entry is a bit long. I could go and on talking about people I love... this song is for her. sayang nek!!